What makes the Dallas Cowboys "America's Team"? Historically, these Little Orphan Annies rose from 1960s hard-knock expansion to Daddy Warbucks' Super Bowl darlings and the country ate them up like slap-ya-mama cookies. They have won one playoff game since hoisting the Lombardi Trophy in 1996 and people are still stuffing their faces with what they're hoping is fudge.
Nonetheless, the title has stood the test of time, though franchises such as the Green Bay Packers and Pittsburgh Steelers wrestle the Boys for it with valiancy and validity. Regardless of its owner, "America's Team" is the sport of football's Manifest Destiny.
As far as college is concerned, fandom is too widespread based on each individual's loyalty to their respective alma mater to seamlessly appoint the "Nation's Team". While the NFL's versatile criterion including loving to hate them (or vice versa), a team's "poster child" status, and perennial or underdog successes can easily be applied, the NCAA presents such a juxtaposing culture that the title may or may not rightfully adhere to the so-to-speak minor league.
Of course, supposing it does, one program is prepared to make a subjectively strong argument, and considering how this won't be found on the Wyoming Cowboys' blog, you can deduct who is hypothetically fighting on about it. Here are five reasons why:
1) USC represents Los Angeles, the most prestigious U.S. city lacking a professional franchise, and fans will still metaphorically risk their lives supporting the Raiders over FUCLA.
2) USC certainly behaves like an NFL team, from free agent acquisitions (Silas Redd last season, Delvon Simmons this past Wednesday, and subdues rumors encircling Everett Golson) to sanctioned Reggie Bush-league scandal.
3) The Spirit of Troy is undeniably distinguishable: the emulated ancestry of Tommy Trojan; the cardinal n' gold flowing through the student body's undying devotion; the actual band's IMDB merits; the sequestered reality that South Carolina yearns to be them, making SCAR a monkey's uncle.
4) USC is a star-studded hot tub of talent both on and off the field, and soon the gridiron and sideline could each sport a Snoop Doggy Dogg.
5) Whether we're competent or irrelevant in any given season, people still waste precious energy despising Arrogant Nation.
Sounding familiar, Jerry Jones?
Follow the developments of the Italian Trojan's "Nation's Team" bracket here.