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Around SBN: Chauncey Billups Injures Achilles Tendon

Trojans: What do you want for Christmas?



Ho, Ho, Ho... 'Tis the Season to be jolly, fa la la la la la la la la. It's the magical time of year when all your wishes come true! Alas, some Trojans have been naughty and all they deserve is a small lump of coal or a one way bus ticket to Cleveland. After a tumultuous season that revealed the serious deficiencies in USC's coaching staff, it is time for good old Santa Claus to bring his bag of goodies to Heritage Hall. Let us prepare the way by roasting some real turkeys.

Feliz Navidad!

Poll
What do you want for Christmas?
1. Fire Jeremy Bates
10 votes
2. Fire Johnny Morton
1 votes
3. Fire Rocky Seto
1 votes
4. Clean sweep, throw all the bums out!
27 votes

39 votes | Poll has closed

This is a FanPost and does not necessarily reflect the views of Conquest Chronicles' writers or editors. It does reflect the views of this particular fan though, which is as important as the views of Conquest Chronicles' writers or editors.

Comment 32 comments  |  0 recs  | 

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Hint, there is only one correct answer!

Although, I would keep Rocky, and just demote him back to secondary coach.

by DFWTrojan on Dec 6, 2009 3:02 PM PST reply actions  

Why was fire Pete Carroll (by watching him die a fire) an option?!!?

(ps- I’m kidding)

by impaulv on Dec 6, 2009 3:43 PM PST reply actions  

errr. let me try that again...

Why was fire Pete Carroll (by watching him die a fire) NOT an option?!!?

by impaulv on Dec 6, 2009 3:43 PM PST up reply actions  

again, it’s a joke

by impaulv on Dec 6, 2009 3:43 PM PST up reply actions  

We’re still working through the hyperbole workshop.

After that, the barefaced nonsense in responses workshop. There’s a long way to go yet.

by DC Trojan on Dec 6, 2009 5:48 PM PST up reply actions   1 recs

That's a "recommend-ed" comment!

“barefaced-nonsense-in-responses workshop”? I need one of those too you’repaulv! sometimes, at least. welcome to the workshop!

"As for being a Raiders fan, I wouldn't wish that fucking shit on anybody." [the venerable OTS at Roll Bama Roll}

by BixBeiderbecke on Dec 7, 2009 8:44 AM PST up reply actions  

ok Loco here is my list 1 D Williams to come back along with all the other juniors. 2 a new off. cord. ( Norm Chow) 3 ED O to come back and help the D Line and recruiting 4 A bowl victory

by Dodgermanramon on Dec 6, 2009 4:03 PM PST via mobile reply actions  

Regarding #2: I'd settle for Carl Smith

He coached Matt Leinart in his 2004 Heisman Season. He joined our staff after last season, then ran off to Cleveland -that’s why we ended up with Bates. If PC digs deep and brings in Norm Chow we would have a dream team.

¡Fusílenlo, después veriguamos! - Pancho Villa

by Locoweed 1.1 on Dec 6, 2009 5:06 PM PST up reply actions  

Norm Chow

well if it takes a pay raise to get Norm back as our off. Cord. count me in I’m good for a few bucks

by Dodgermanramon on Dec 6, 2009 5:11 PM PST via mobile up reply actions  

No need for that, Bates is already making close to a million. Take that off the books and presto!

¡Fusílenlo, después veriguamos! - Pancho Villa

by Locoweed 1.1 on Dec 6, 2009 5:20 PM PST up reply actions  

A MacBook Pro.

Failing that, playcalling that matches the strengths of the players we’ve got, and doesn’t alternate between safety first and trying to hit balls out of the park.

by DC Trojan on Dec 6, 2009 5:49 PM PST reply actions  

My money back!

For all those eggs that Coach Carroll laid this year. I went to Autzen, my less than $30 Osama costume was confiscated at LAX. (they actually put together my AK gun, found the plastic flask hidden even- these people must read Conquest Chronicles or else. . .how else? and then- I had to rent a tux in Eugene- 2 of ’em, put me out $150 plus change. fuck yeah, I want that back too!)

How can Pete possibly play “this is gonna pay off next year” with my money this year!

For what it’s worth. . . . all I want for Christmas from USC football is MY DAMN MONEY BACK! That was not Trojan football this year. It WAS NOT!

"As for being a Raiders fan, I wouldn't wish that fucking shit on anybody." [the venerable OTS at Roll Bama Roll}

by BixBeiderbecke on Dec 7, 2009 8:48 AM PST reply actions  

Perhaps you could try writing to Chip Kelly?

by DC Trojan on Dec 7, 2009 11:57 AM PST up reply actions  

You got a good point!

Think CK is amenable? He’s had prolly THE BEST freshman coaching year I can remember? Man did he ever right his ship. Something Coach Carroll couldn’t/didn’t do. I know they (& their team situations) are totally different. . . .I hope Coach Carroll finds himself a perspective for this past year.

Chip Kelly eh? I’ll give it a whirl!

"As for being a Raiders fan, I wouldn't wish that fucking shit on anybody." [the venerable OTS at Roll Bama Roll}

by BixBeiderbecke on Dec 7, 2009 2:14 PM PST up reply actions  

Scott Reid at the OC Post agrees

BATES MUST GO! Reid wrote a brutal assessment today entitled:
USC football: Glory days over if Bates stays

So far Barkley has done nothing to suggest that the notion of his leading USC to another electric night with a nation watching is anything other than a figment of Carroll’s imagination. It will remain there as long as Bates remains at USC.
Carroll’s over-the-top promotion of Barkley was nothing less than irresponsible. The only thing more irresponsible would be to leave Barkley and the program’s future, even Carroll’s own legacy, in Bates’ ill-equipped hands.
I couldn’t agree more.

¡Fusílenlo, después veriguamos! - Pancho Villa

by Locoweed 1.1 on Dec 7, 2009 1:15 PM PST reply actions  

I am actually working on a piece about this particular article for tonight...

I wouldn’t read too much into this yet…need to be careful on this guys agenda…

by Paragon SC on Dec 7, 2009 1:39 PM PST up reply actions  

True, he IS a douche

I didn’t make it a Fanpost because of the inflammatory style and over-the-topness of the piece. But I think we can all agree that Bates has mishandled Barkley, and should move on.

¡Fusílenlo, después veriguamos! - Pancho Villa

by Locoweed 1.1 on Dec 7, 2009 1:52 PM PST up reply actions  

For Christmas, I want

Seantrel Henderson and Lache Seastrunk please :)!!

We need O-line help and our RBs are leaving next year. So much for getting excited about Marc Tyler… He’s been quite a disappointment.

by Julio Nievas on Dec 7, 2009 1:42 PM PST reply actions  

I sure hope you’ve been nice!

¡Fusílenlo, después veriguamos! - Pancho Villa

by Locoweed 1.1 on Dec 7, 2009 1:54 PM PST up reply actions  

Is asking for Jeffcoat too much? :)

by Julio Nievas on Dec 7, 2009 2:33 PM PST up reply actions  

Nah, Santa is generous to a fault!

¡Fusílenlo, después veriguamos! - Pancho Villa

by Locoweed 1.1 on Dec 7, 2009 2:53 PM PST up reply actions  

And yet I don’t see you giving him anything like the shit that “Dear Leader” gets ;)

by DC Trojan on Dec 7, 2009 3:22 PM PST up reply actions  

Santa = Mythical Elf that rules the North Pole
Dear Leader = Real live PITA that’s generous to a fault with MY money

¡Fusílenlo, después veriguamos! - Pancho Villa

by Locoweed 1.1 on Dec 7, 2009 3:56 PM PST up reply actions  

Oh relax, it’s China’s money. What could go wrong?

by DC Trojan on Dec 7, 2009 6:56 PM PST up reply actions  

Nothing at all! The are also solely responsible for providing the elf labor to fill O’Santa’s Sack with toys for all the girls and boys!

¡Fusílenlo, después veriguamos! - Pancho Villa

by Locoweed 1.1 on Dec 7, 2009 7:05 PM PST up reply actions  

So you’re saying it’s actually People’s Tchotcke Factory 72 that’s the North Pole production facility?

I don’t know whether to be upset or not, I’m certainly not surprised.

by DC Trojan on Dec 7, 2009 7:27 PM PST up reply actions  

Yep, they’ve fitted outboard motors on all those loose icebergs to ship the stuff around the Pacific. They used Serbian chain saws to carve secret compartments inside of them, that way they don’t arouse suspicions when they’re detected on radar.

¡Fusílenlo, después veriguamos! - Pancho Villa

by Locoweed 1.1 on Dec 7, 2009 7:38 PM PST up reply actions  

I’d expect no less from those devious (allegedly former) Reds!

by DC Trojan on Dec 8, 2009 9:05 AM PST up reply actions  

I'd write him a letter saying

Dear Santa,

Why do you operate in the North Pole? I’m guessing cheap elf labor, lower environmental standards, and tax breaks.Is this really the example you want to set for the impressionable kids out there?

My plan is to put him on the defensive before he considers how good I am.

Bring the top recruits!

by Julio Nievas on Dec 7, 2009 10:40 PM PST up reply actions  

Wait, the North Pole is the Marshall Islands?

by DC Trojan on Dec 8, 2009 9:05 AM PST up reply actions  

Please

Dear Santa,
A coherent Offensive Philosophy somewhat based in the 21st Century.
PS – Maybe some REAL Coordinators!
Oh Yeah and real fans that stay until the final whistle, instead of trying to beat the traffic.

by gnossos on Dec 9, 2009 10:21 AM PST reply actions  

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